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HomeMy WebLinkAbout02-09-26 Correspondence - Disability Rights Montana - At the Capitol, Thinking About Why I Come Off CondescendingFrom:Disability Rights Montana - Growth Rings To:Bozeman Public Comment Subject:[EXTERNAL]At the Capitol, Thinking About Why I Come Off Condescending Date:Monday, February 9, 2026 7:31:25 AM CAUTION: This email originated from outside of the organization. Do not click links or open attachments unless you recognize the sender and know the content is safe. Forwarded this email? Subscribe here for more Every paid subscription supports Disability Rights Montana’s work across Montana. Federal funding is nowhere near sufficient to meet the advocacy and culture change work that is needed. You can help fund the future you want to see! At the Capitol, Thinking About Why I Come Off Condescending.mp4 Watch now At the Capitol, Thinking About Why ICome Off Condescending How neurodivergent directness gets misread and how we can all work tomake disability conversations human‑sized, safe, and productive. READ IN APP Hey friends, This week’s Growth Rings episode is a little different. I filmed it on a chilly Helena morning, sitting on a bench by the Capitol, reflecting on a communication knot many of us face, especially those of us who are neurodivergent and passionate about disability policy. “My intention isn’t condescension, it’s connection and clarity. But intention and impact aren’t the same.” “Lawmakers don’t need to know everything to start caring. They need to know it’s emotionally safe to ask the next question.” “If I’m info‑dumping, it’s because I value you, I think you can use the context. The work is making sure it lands.” FEB 9 Pull‑quotes from the episode Why this episode If you geek out on policy (like I do) and care about culture change (like we do), you’ve probably noticed a pattern: Directness + thorough explanation = clarity in our heads Directness + thorough explanation = condescension in someone else’s ears In the episode, I share how that mismatch shows up for me, and how it can unintentionally push people out of the conversation, including legislators who want to learn but feel unsure, intimidated, or worried about “saying the wrong thing.” This isn’t about changing who we are. It’s about meeting people halfway so more Montanans feel safe joining the work. Why ND communication gets misread: Many of us explain deeply to prevent misunderstandings. That can land as lecturing when someone’s overwhelmed. Intention vs. impact: I can be confident and concise because I’ve thought it through — but that confidence can read as “closed.” Legislators are learners, too: Plenty of lawmakers want to help on disability issues. They’re just not sure where to start or what words to use, and that anxiety sometimes sounds like silence. A better way to invite people in: We can keep our honesty and detail and make the conversation emotionally safe. What I cover (in plain language) A few practices I’m committing to (and inviteyou to try) Model curiosity, not correction. Ask a question first. Let the other person show you where they are. Normalize not knowing. Say “I’m not sure” and “It depends” out loud. It opens the door for others to do the same. Create emotional safety. Treat hard policy talks like human conversations. People learn and change when it feels safe to be imperfect. Match information to interest. Offer the headline; share the iceberg only if they ask for it. Pause the interrupt. Excitement is great, but let the other person land their thought before you add yours. If you represent Montanans and want to engage more confidently on disability — welcome. You don’t need perfect language to start. Bring your questions. Bring your uncertainty. We can learn together, at a human pace, with respect and zero gotchas. Want a one‑pager on “how to talk about disability respectfully” tailored for the Legislature? Reply to this post. I’m happy to share a practical, judgment‑free cheat sheet. Your clarity, lived experience, and persistence are moving this state forward. Let’s keep it accessible, not just in buildings and websites, but in the tone of our conversations. Directness can be an invitation when it travels with empathy. An open invitation to Montana legislators &staff For advocates, families, and disabledMontanans Watch the episode and leave a comment with one practice you’re going to try. Forward this post to a neighbor, a school board member, or a legislator who cares. Hit subscribe so you don’t miss new episodes exploring disability culture in Montana. Growth Rings is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Upgrade to paid “What Makes a Disability Conversation Safe?” “Policy Without Jargon: How to Brief a Busy Lawmaker in 90 Seconds” “Rural Disability Culture: Making Long Distances Feel Close” If there’s a topic or Montana town you want me to feature next, reply and tell me where to go. Thanks for being here, and for building a kinder, smarter conversation in our state. With appreciation, David Executive Director, Disability Rights Montana Growth Rings — stories and strategy for disability culture in Montana How you can support this work Coming up on this episode of Growth Rings You’re currently a free subscriber to Life Beyond Compliance. Upgrading to paid subscriptions supports Disability Rights Montana’s work across Montana. Federal funding is no where near sufficient to meet the advocacy and culture change work that is needed. You can help fund the future you want to see! Upgrade to paid LIKE COMMENT RESTACK © 2026 Disability Rights Montana1022 Chestnut Street, Helena, MT 59601 Unsubscribe